I may have finally met someone who is on my level. I thought the last girl I was with was absolutely perfect…. Well she wasn’t. Everyone has their flaws. Katrina. She is so intelligent…. She is caring. And she shows it. She also loves CHILDREN! Like any girl I’ve ever met before. But she has none…. And she’s ok with me having 4. She is the type of girl I have been looking for! And best of all…. SHE LOVES GOD! Number one rule. If a girl doesn’t love God the way you do…. it won’t work. She inspires me to do the right things. I just don’t understand how the good girls end up with bad guys. But then again. I do understand. I mean…. just wow. We have the most detailed and intelligent conversations. If only i could write them down and go back and look at them to make me smile when I feel down. When I’m down. I think about her. Katrina. I’m on a path. I’m one a serious path. Shes beautiful too. Thicker just like I like. I hate a skinny girl if you hadn’t noticed. I made some mistakes in my life. If you feel like you can accomplish something, you better go for it and not let life pass you by. This is someone I believe I could actually be with. I enjoy talking to her so much. As an intelligent individual I think she is so worth my time and effort unlike the one I’m with now. I’d rather stay up and talk to her all night than entertain this bs I go thru on a daily basis. Katrina. I don’t even know your last name, but you’ve made an impact on me so much. You’ve inspired me to believe so much already. I hope I’m not too far in over my head. She understands my concepts and beliefs as I do hers. But wow. because I haven’t met her in person. Am I insane? I’ve only talked to her thru a series of messages over a span of days online. I haven’t even asked her for her phone number. I’ve just been so intrigued by her conversation. I don’t even know how her voice sounds. I’m just excited when I see I have a new message from her. I’m floating man. I’m floating hard. Katrina. Does this sound like a movie or what. Sounds like an “Adam Sandler” movie lol. I’m so speechless as to what to say. I want to say so much but don’t know how. As I refresh my page every 2 minutes to see if I have a message from her. Am I letting my heart get the best of me? I must ask God to show me the way. I must know something. Maybe she isn’t for me. But for a greater guy than myself. I don’t know. Im so puzzled as I lay next to one person thinking about someone else. Is this wrong? I do believe so. But Katrina makes me feel like I’m worth it. Not too many people have made me feel this way. I just must be careful. For as good as a situation may be. It can turn out equally as bad. Oh man oh man…. Katrina….

When you have found the right person for you and you let them go time and time again… what do you do? That person who makes you not think about the bad things in life? The person who you don’t think about having sex with? The person who makes your brain stimulate…. The one person who you can actually tell everything to. And vice versa. But I let her go. Now that i experienced this. I want to change my life. I want to create a life to where i could at lleast live in a possibility of having her back. but i know that will never happen. I can’t live without her. I’ll choose death before i live without her. I see her everyday and can’t say a thing. I deserve death.